Covid Era Upgrade

Covid Upgrade

Love and friendships are two of the most meaningful sectors of our lives affected by covid.

Obviously if we know someone who has gotten sick with coronavirus, we feel great care and worry as to the specific outcome for the person.

Possibly more subtle to our understanding of covid’s effect on our lives, is within the broader ways we emotionally attach to friends, family members and our relationship.

The suddenness of our social isolation gave no one a chance to prepare for the uninvited separation between us and those with whom we feel close.

In addition, the relationship toward ourselves was forced to change.

If we always identified as an outstanding performance musician and suddenly were restricted to zoom shows, we’d face a major shift in identity.

If we don’t especially get along with our partner and work was a welcome separation for each of us, then the walls of our house may suddenly feel increasingly tight.

Examining expectations of ourselves and others, is itself valuable.
The lack of our own control as to when this reflection period begins, how to recognize if we’ve done a good job with this, becomes more difficult because of the second major life change covid introduced.

Financial uncertainty.
Because our politicians manage covid primarily by manipulating our economic and financial lives and not strictly as a healthcare problem, the sector of our lives related to money, has significantly slipped from our hands.

The combination of sudden instability in our friendships, relationship, and family life, along with weakened control of our money, explains the great amount of anxiety people currently feel.

To regain our inner strength and sense of who we each are, give yourself quiet, give yourself time to be in nature, and develop an ear for in depth conversations with the people about whom you care.

The first two items are apparent.
The third for most people requires some conscious effort.
One way to teach yourself more sensitive listening and talking enjoyment is through phone conversations.

Video conference modalities are fine for business meetings since these mostly are informational, not emotionally connective as within relationships.

Make use of your phone instead. In a phone call it is clearly known that the only modality is your ear, mind, and heart.
These comprise the fundamentals of a relationship.
Why dilute these with the distortion created by video conference of the person who is not with you, being beside you?

Finally,
Limit your social and news media time.
These modalities thrive on what weakens us. Your anxiety is their marketing platform.

If your interest is to more deeply know who you are, keep your friendships and relationships strong, then consider the points above.

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About Sherry Katz

Sherry Katz, LCSW is primarily a couples therapist who counsels partners and individuals of all adult ages, in relieving tension and unhappiness in their relationships. The spectrum of care in her practice includes recuperating from infidelity, clarifying and strengthening trust and communication, restoring and developing common ground for a relationship. Ms. Katz has a secondary practice interest in helping family members align themselves in response to caring for elderly parents, especially a parent who has Alzheimer's Disease.Old Stories, New Views Family Therapy

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