Aging, Don’t Let Them Wait


My grandmother used to say, “Old age stinks.” She said it until she passed at 98. For her, there were no Golden Years. She just sat until her time came.

We are all aging, and we will all die. Most people resist facing this truth for themselves and their dear ones. So, they wait until there are urgent circumstances, for themselves or their families.

Since our population of people needing care has grown enormously, many options have been created to deal with the overwhelming need to offer solutions.

I remember bringing my mother up from Florida where she had lived many years. We could not care for her from so many miles away. We found a nice assisted living. She was well cared for; however, it was not ideal – certainly not where I would want to be.

Since then, new, fancier facilities with all kinds of “perks” filled the places for seniors. Most of those seniors were advanced in years and ill.
My title is Don’t Let Them Wait. I’m saying that for you, too. Don’t wait.

I had investigated over-fifty-five communities. They did not resolve my particular issues – night blindness, and I was not ready to give up my career. And I knew that at our ages, we would need to do yet another move as we declined.

My good friends chose to go into over-fifty-five communities. They have beautiful, spacious homes which were not inexpensive. They will have to make yet another move as they age. The job of packing and moving is huge and stressful. The older one gets the harder it is. And, do you want your children or someone else to make the choice of where to go?

I wanted to save my children from having to face that task. I made that decision for myself. At 75, I chose to go into a continuing care facility. Medford Leas seemed like the right place for me.

It appealed to me because it has a sterling reputation, offers amazing benefits, activities – just about any you can think of, a large medical department, assisted living, and long care until the end.
Before that time comes, there are happy people enjoying the amenities. There are buses to take you shopping throughout the week, a bus to take you to the Kimmel and other events. And, here there are educational courses, live music, videos, and movies and, did I mention three excellent places to dine.

Don’t wait, and do not leave this decision to your children. I call my new home Happy Town. As a book I read years ago said “Live until you die.” I really feel alive and safe.

Don’t wait until you can’t enjoy such an experience.

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About Paula Susan

Paula Susan, MSW, LCSW, Masters in Clinical Social Work & Psychology; specialist in Trauma and Relationships since 1982. In 1991, I integrated the powerfully transformative process of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). Research demonstrates that it facilitates life-altering changes more efficiently and effectively than talk therapy alone. I teach skills such as communication and anxiety relief to improve connection with others. Over the decades, I’ve come to respect how much damage even small traumatic experiences inflict on our core beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. I consider it a privilege to help my clients understand and change what has undermined their happiness and their relationships. I do it with warmth, integrity, humor, and profound respect for those who care about the quality of this small piece of time we have on

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