Embracing Thirty as an Autistic Female

Embracing Thirty as an Autistic Female

by Erica Leung~
Until recently I’ve been having a hard time trying to deal with the fact I am going to be 30 this month. I realized I can’t stop the inevitable so  I decided to embrace the joys of entering a new era and use this time to better myself as a person.

During  the first twenty nine years of my life I have been fighting an ongoing battle trying to find  comfort within my own skin. In an Asian family, any type difference is viewed as a crime punishable by law so one can only imagine the way I was treated when I came out far less than perfect. I’ve been shunned by everyone at one point or another and they were not shy at all letting me know how much I didn’t belong in their “cookie cutter” world. I learned resentment an early age and even as I write this today, I still get a pit in my stomach when it comes to interacting with my dads side of the family.

In addition to not fitting in with the ones who should have loved me regardless of my issues, I also got the added bonus of not  blending into the worlds mold either. I was far from your star athlete and I certainly wasn’t your annoying in your face cheerleader. I hated going to school as to me, it was another mandatory jail sentence to make my life miserable. It was 2,430 days or 13 years of being subjected to daily taunts by students and staff alike.

It wasn’t until I started taking my therapy sessions seriously that I was able to come into my own and accept the reality that having Autism is not a terrible tragedy unless I make it so. I cannot change everyone but I can change myself to become the best version of ME possible.

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About Erica Leung

In my life I have been able to accomplish great things despite the obstacles I have overcome. When I was 17 years old I was first diagnosed with Autism. I share my life challenges and triumphs by blogging. Follow me www.autisticfemale.com A Girls Life on the Autism Spectrum. I promise to make you laugh more than cry!

4 thoughts on “Embracing Thirty as an Autistic Female

  1. Laura

    I can relate to that post. I am two years younger than you and although I’ve had success academically (am a grad student), most of my classmates are in long term committed relationships and have families of their own. I’m very close to my family and have a few special friends and am currently happy. However, sometimes I have dreams ranging to adopting as a single parent once I graduate and gain more executive functioning skills or other things that may or may not happen. I know where I stand as far as morals, but am at the point I am deciding how much of ME I want to show the world and how much I want to blend in.

  2. Erica

    Hi Laura!

    Thank you for reading my article! I am glad you were able to identify with my work. As a writer that’s always great news to hear! I too can relate to having friends I went to school with who have since then settled down. My advice to you is don’t compare yourself to them or think that’s the example you need to follow. I’ve done that before and wound up in a depression. Its normal to get jealous when others have what you want but not having it doesn’t mean that your doing something wrong it just means its not the right time for you.

    Best of luck!


  3. Lee L.

    Here’s how I embraced turning 30 while being autistic…. I lied about my age. I will continue to lie about my age until I can no longer get away with it.

  4. Erica

    Why would you want to do that for? There’s nothing wrong with growing older it’s a natural progression of life! We all get old and but we also get to learn and grow as individuals. I just think with all things to deny or lie about in life age shouldn’t be one of them.


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