Happy Aging is Fearless

happy aging

What many people believe is a good quality of life while aging, is the ability to live far differently than during the preretirement years.

People look forward and actually may, travel to vacation and site seeing destinations, have more time together with children and grandchildren, and overall start slowing their daily pace in order to smell the proverbial roses of existing here on Earth.

Sounds peaceful, pleasant and fulfilling, right?

So why are we waiting until almost the end of life, to live in a satisfying way?

My proposed answer is that most people have been brought up to fear being who they are truly.

From a very young age we are taught the discipline of study, that achievement is  a value with its own reward, marriage, birthing and raising children is the prime marker of respectable adulthood, and to put to the side any of our individuality which bristles at values being imposed upon us.

For some people, their inner voice does not allow them to accept living in ways which feel unnatural to that particular person.  Regardless of the majority lifestyle, some persons, albeit with possible significant inner doubt and extensive self-reflection, must live closely to their unique nature.

The feeling that fear gives us, is to run away from whatever we sense is physically or emotionally dangerous or risky to ourselves.

What is your fear that motivates you to run int the opposite direction when making the major life decisions that will influence your life for most of it?

For example, do you consider having a choice to create your own life path, or does meeting the cultural benchmarks feel more of a priority?

Some people fear the disapproval of others to the degree of stopping themselves from living the way they would like, by anticipating this disapproval and avoiding what is only in their imagination.

Others may actually disapprove of how you would like living your life.

Then what?  Would you consider addressing this so far, theoretical problem if and when it comes up, not prior?

Spending most of one’s decades of life in fear of imagined disapproval, suppressing one’s true likes and interests, is one explanation as to why people feel liberated by retirement and the approved of time frame of doing what one would like with one’s own life.

Why wait until the aging process has begun?   The possibility of happiness is with you today.

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About Sherry Katz

Sherry Katz, LCSW is primarily a couples therapist who counsels partners and individuals of all adult ages, in relieving tension and unhappiness in their relationships. The spectrum of care in her practice includes recuperating from infidelity, clarifying and strengthening trust and communication, restoring and developing common ground for a relationship. Ms. Katz has a secondary practice interest in helping family members align themselves in response to caring for elderly parents, especially a parent who has Alzheimer's Disease.Old Stories, New Views Family Therapy

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