What I Have Learned from Living My Life


One of the major things I learned from my life thus far is, that every day, every moment is precious. It is another opportunity for you to be the best of yourself.

I’ve learned that each person we meet has the right to be who they are (excluding cruelty and severe mental illness.)

The way of thinking and believing belongs to each person, and we must hear them, and respect their right to their perspective.

Each person we meet has a story. Most of them contain their own small and large, painful traumas. We can’t possibly know those experiences, and how they shaped the person.

So, I look for the good, and recognize no matter how they present themselves, there is reason, and they long to know love and kindness. They may not know how to accept and trust it. Your kindness may be suspicious to them, until they understand themselves.

My message to them is that we all can and deserve to heal – deeply – with good help. We can create the remainder of our lives, in a healthy, life-sustaining way. We can rid our lives of the ghosts which live within us.
That is the work that I am committed to. I do it with love and with compassion, and I do it with my skills, and experience.

On a personal note, I have learned that it takes loving, trusting, and respecting yourself to create a peaceful and rich life. It takes the ability to recognize what is real, and what is harmful to the essence of who you are.

It’s not just about how you show up in the world; it is really about how you show up to your core beliefs, as you deal with the world, and the human beings who inhabit it.

My love for life and the people I encounter is a wonderful trait. Yet, personally, I have a right to protect myself from vitriol. In my most intimate circles, I invite those who are healthy, will respect who I am, and my love for them.

I have a responsibility to nurture my soul, my core beliefs, and the essence of who I am. And, to remember not everyone has taken the time, and invested in knowing, and growing themselves. I know how worthwhile that is.
Someone once said that the un-examined life is not worth living. And knowing who you are, and then healing what doesn’t serve you, offers the way to joy and rewarding love – “a life worth living.”

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About Paula Susan

Paula Susan, MSW, LCSW, Masters in Clinical Social Work & Psychology; specialist in Trauma and Relationships since 1982. In 1991, I integrated the powerfully transformative process of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). Research demonstrates that it facilitates life-altering changes more efficiently and effectively than talk therapy alone. I teach skills such as communication and anxiety relief to improve connection with others. Over the decades, I’ve come to respect how much damage even small traumatic experiences inflict on our core beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. I consider it a privilege to help my clients understand and change what has undermined their happiness and their relationships. I do it with warmth, integrity, humor, and profound respect for those who care about the quality of this small piece of time we have on earth.www.paulasusan.com

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